Family

Sarah is my wife, my best friend, and the person who sees me most clearly — including the parts I can't always see myself. She's a talented writer, a devoted mother, and the steadiest presence in my life. Before a manic episode fully arrives, she knows. That kind of love has skin in the game.

We have three kids. Malachi is biologically mine — he's three, bright, impossibly energetic, and he already has opinions about everything. The older two came with Sarah, and building a blended family has been one of the most humbling, rewarding things I've done. It's also the hardest kind of design problem: no API, no documentation, just showing up and trying to get it right.

Tech used to be my identity. Family changed that. The work matters, but it's not the point anymore. The point is the people sitting at the table.

• poemsbysarah.com — Sarah's poetry.
• What Requests Taught Me About Marriage — API design principles as relationship advice.
• Sarah Knows First — On the structural limits of self-knowledge.